Dating Your Co-Worker

Having a relationship with a co-worker is something that is usually frowned upon. In fact, many businesses expressly forbid employees to have romantic relationships with each other. Still, you can't really control who you fall in love with. It isn't as simple as you deciding you're going to be in love with your neighbor instead of being in love with your co-worker.

You've probably heard others say that there are many things in life you can control, but falling in love isn't one of those things. Love happens, and it may just be that you end up falling in love with your colleague.

It won't help if you read the company handbook a thousand times and get it in your head that you're not allowed to have a romantic relationship with a co-worker. Unless you're made of stone, you're going to find it very hard to fight your attraction to a co-worker when Cupid's arrow hits you.

So what should you do if you end up wanting to date someone you work with? First, you'll need to talk with the other person. Your co-worker may have given you an indication that he or she is interested in you that's why you took notice. This tells you that the attraction is mutual.

Having a relationship with your co-worker could work out. In some instances, you and your co-worker may be able to have a romantic relationship without reprimand or dire consequences. If you do pursue an interoffice relationship, you will need to be sensible and smart about it.

The company may forbid romantic relationships between co-workers, but if you do end up in one, don't hide it from your superiors and even co-workers. It's best to be honest and open. Talk to your boss. Let him know what's happening.

If you come out clean from the start, your boss may be more accepting of the situation. If you try to keep your relationship from your boss and he finds out about it later, you may lose your job.

Communicate with your co-worker. Be open with each other. Make sure both of you understand that your personal relationship should never interfere with your work. Agree that things around the workplace shouldn't change just because you are romantically involved with each other. When you're at the office, you'll both do your best to remain professional.

What if the person you're having a relationship with at the office is higher up the company ladder than you? Have an understanding beforehand that when it comes to work, particularly if you need to be reprimanded on work-related issues, he or she will not show bias toward you, nor should you expect to receive special treatment.

If your work performance starts to be affected by the relationship, you need to take a step back and seriously assess the situation. Find out where you can possibly make changes.

Be open to the possibility that one of you may have to leave the job. Usually, this is a personal decision. Some people leave their jobs because they discover that they don't really want to work with someone they are intimately involved with.

The relationship is important to them and they are open to finding a new job in order to maintain the relationship.



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